ROOM RAGE
CRIMINAL ACTS OF DESTRUCTION INSPIRED BY ROAD WITCH TRIALS

How is it that discarded consumer durables arranged in a street and not blocking traffic can inspire violence and serious criminal behaviour? Is 'Room Rage' a sign of seriously deluded car-owning bigotry or a severe form of art criticism?

Oddly enough, incidents of Room Rage are nearly always committed by people who think nothing of parking their cars on the pavement, which is a criminal offense in the United Kingdom, although the police dont seem at all interested in enforcing it.


LIVING ROOM: The first incidence of Room Rage was when a driver deliberately smashed his 4X4 pickup truck into a cut-down version of LIVING ROOM. After that, he came to my door, shouted obscenities, and grassed me to the Council. The Council duly came a few hours later and removed the entire Living Room.

SLEEPING POLICEMAN'S BED: Another Room Rage incident was when a guy flipped his lid while he flipped SLEEPING POLICEMAN'S BED onto the pavement right in front of me and the kid in the photo who helped set it up.


NIGHTMARE BEFORE CHRISTMAS: The most disturbing incidence of Room Rage was when a re-positioned version of the NIGHTMARE BEFORE CHRISTMAS room was placed mostly in my front garden, decorated for Christmas. A sofa and table were on one side of the street, and the rest of the living room was in the garden. While my family and visitors were cosy in the Living Room (the one inside the house) having a nice Christmas Evening snack, somebody silently piled up the furniture in front of my garden and set it alight.

Had we not spotted the fire soon after it started to spread, it very likely would have got out of control, possibly setting my car, tree, and even my house on fire. Luckily, I was able to put it out with a fire extinguisher just in time.

When I phoned Thames Valley Police to tell them someone had deliberately set fire to my property, they asked some questions over the phone but did not think it was necessary to come to the house, even though I had extra mince pies. The police assure me they're taking the case seriously. Details, evidence, and background information have been forwarded to the police.